14 Months of Maternity Leave

Yes, you read it right. I have been on "maternity leave" for a total of 14 months. I left work March 15, 2012 (when I was 9 months pregnant) and tomorrow, May 16, 2013 is my back-to-reality day.

Goodbye freedom.

My son is now 13 months today. Me and my husband couldn't deny the fact that he is ready for daycare. Two weeks after his first birthday, we started to register him for part-time care; just in the afternoon. "So Baby can adjust slowly" is what we said; although 'so Mommy and Daddy have more time to adjust being away from baby is more accurate.'

Baby had no problems with daycare. The sitter said she had no problems with him at all. He NEVER cries. He just plays, eats whatever is given to him, takes a nap when he wants to.

We decided to let him start on whole day care two weeks before I go back to work. Again, so I can adjust better with being away from Baby.

We can't deny the developments that we see from Baby since he went to daycare. He eats more solid foods now, is even MORE playful and interactive, drinks from a cup or straw, naps when you tell him it  is nap time, and he never demanded to be rocked to sleep anymore too. He has no problems trying to sleep at night since he is probably tired by the whole day of playing. They even meet with other daycare kids at the park/playground. It also helps that he is playing with older toddlers than him. They are 3 to 5 year olds and my son is the only "baby" there.

I drop him off at the daycare around 7:30AM and as soon as he sees his sitters, he will let go of me and go to them - which is a good thing. Only shows that he trusts and feel safe around them. 

I then go back home and keep myself busy with running errands and house chores while playing LOUD music; since that is the only time I can listen to my music amped up. 

I pick Baby up at 5:00 PM and as soon as he sees me, stops whatever he is doing, turbo-speed-crawls to me while shouting "Mamamamaaaaa!!!" I carry him and he starts waving bye bye to his sitters and the other kids there. SO DARN CUTE! It melts my heart! ❤ 😊

We go home, I leave him on his play area and I usually sit and (finally) relax on the couch to watch TV (Friends or Family Feud usually), after a few minutes, Baby will always climb up the couch and give me a lot of hugs then cuddles beside me. He just sits there, beside me regardless of what I would be watching. Awww. Those are the moments when all other emotions just melt away and turn to a feeling of overwhelming love. ❤❤❤

So tomorrow, nothing should change with Baby's setup except that I may be tired from work and even more tired with a 40-minute drive home.

Although I am pretty sure all fatigue will be melted away by Baby's smile at the end of the day. 

Those magical two letters "ma" said by the sweetest little voice of a smiling little boy is the best energy boost this Mommy would ever need.

Motherhood: Low Maintenance Baby

Baby is now 8 months old. We have been receiving compliments from our friends telling us that our Baby is very low maintenance and has excellent temperament compared to others.

I'd like to give credit to Babycenter. It has been our best friend during pregnancy, up until now, taking care of baby. We are so impressed with how much information Babycenter has provided us. To a point that we sometimes feel it has some kind of ESP because we get email articles from them on topics that we have lingering questions on.

Just a summary, here are some things that Baby is able to do now:

- He sleeps in his own bedroom. He started sleeping in his own crib at 2 months, and in his own room at 7 months.

- He naps on his own. Just leave him in his crib and hand him his pacifier.
- He sleeps through the night. He has a stable sleep pattern. 8:00 PM bedtime. Wakes up around 6:00 AM.

- He holds his milk bottle and finishes 7 to 8 oz., 5 to 6 times a day.
- He eats 4 oz of pureed vegetable or fruit twice a day. One at lunchtime and one at dinner.
- He is learning to feed himself with his snacks.
- He loves to smile and laugh at strangers. He is extra friendly to women though. Hahaha!
- When out and about or at a party, he keeps still, loves people-watching and will not tantrum. He will start to fuss when he is really sleepy and he is stuck in his stroller. In those cases, we carry him, rock him to sleep for a couple of minutes and strap him back in his stroller.
- He laughs at anything. The easiest trick is to smile at him and he will smile back at you. Laugh at him and he will laugh with you. He is a very happy baby! :)

Motherhood: Mommy Bag in Style

Next month will be my birthday; and for that I decided to 'gift' myself with a fancy diaper bag.

Of all the research I made for preparing for motherhood, I forgot to research about choosing a diaper bag. So I just bought a generic Gerber diaper bag worth $14.99. I chose it for the price, the shape (it can stand on its own) and of course, the color - it matches my son's stroller and car seat set. Haha!

On my son's 3rd month, I already started to notice tears on the Gerber bag. As my husband would always remind me... better buy a more costly one that will last you for a long time. Of course he's right. I didn't realize that you wouldn't have an extra hand to hold your own purse once baby is there. You have the stroller, the diaper bag, the car seat, and of course the baby to take care of. So it was about time to find a fancy, fashionable, and functional diaper bag slash purse.

I started researching about the best rated diaper bags and JJ Cole was one of the top rated. I have been looking for a satchel type bag that will look nice as a Mommy Purse and a Diaper Bag in one. Something I can carry or strap onto the stroller.

I love the designs from Gucci (hello?! $900!!!), Tory Burch (maybe wait for one that is 80% off then I can afford it! haha!), and the one from Coach (yes, a little more saving and I can afford one that is on sale). 

But nothing beats the practicality, the design, and the price of JJ Cole's satchels. It is perfect for what I need!!! I LOVE IT! I can't wait to use it. 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! :)

JJ Cole Faux Leather Satchel Diaper Bag

What's in the box: The lovely bag, the 'manual', the long and soft shoulder straps,
and the patented "Grips" to functionally attach the bag to the stroller. 

The ingenious stroller grips:

Photo grabbed from Amazon.com.

Watch their video demo on this:

Prenatal Vitamins

I was cleaning our medicine cabinet and saw all of my prenatal vitamin bottles there (yes, I haven't thrown them away). Most of them empty, one is half full, & one still full.

I started taking them December 2010. Stopped taking them several months ago. I told my husband I was having a hard time "letting go" of the bottles, for sentimental reasons.

Here's how the conversation went:

Me: I am having separation anxiety with throwing away my prenatal vitamins. We've been together for so long. If I throw them all way, I won't even have a remembrance.

Hubby: (Smiled, looked to his left and mouth-pointed to our son, playing in his bouncer)
       THERE. THAT'S YOUR REMEMBRANCE.

:)

Case closed.

I Quit... or Not!

This is my second attempt at resigning from my current job (as assistant architect / project coordinator).

The first attempt was when I wanted to file for at least a 3-month NON PAID maternity leave, and work from home on the tasks that I know only I can do (as for now). However, boss told me "I don't think you need more than 3 months" or "we can't hold your seat for too long" or "No, we do not allow working from home." For which I replied the next day, saying that I can't guarantee going back before 3 months so I will just "give up my seat." My boss then denied saying those, he said I must have misunderstood him, "What I said was 1 month or 3 months or 1 year. It doesn't matter how long, you can take as much leave as you want just let us know when you will be back. If you say 1 year then that is perfectly fine."

The thing about bosses is, even if they are wrong, they are still right.

So we compromised and told them I will be back mid-Oct. Baby will be 6 months old by then.

A couple weeks after giving birth, I receive a call from boss telling me that he needs a favor and if I can continue my work from home. In my mind I said 'Didn't I propose that to you the last time we spoke and you said no, the office doesn't allow working from home?'

The thing about bosses is, it has to be their idea.

Yes, inception works. It is real.

Five months passed and September is almost gone. I got news from work that they hired a few more people and that they are now rearranging the workspaces to accomodate the changes. They asked me when I will be back and I said "My leave form says until mid-October." I even got news that they are planning to buy me a new set of computer.

I've thought about it a hundred times before. Discussed it with my husband. Discussed it with my parents, my sisters, my friends. The decision is pretty much clear: I AM NOT READY TO LEAVE BABY IN DAYCARE just so I can go back to work.

Yes, I do miss the extra income. But looking at Baby, that income is nothing. Quality time with baby is the best compensation I could ever get!

As my friend says, everytime I feel bad for not earning the extra income, just look at my Baby. True enough, everytime I look at Baby, my i-have-no-income-guilt vanishes!

So here I am again, trying to tell my boss I will not go back to work. I sent him an email last week because he was out of the country. A week later and I still get no response. I am pretty sure he has read my letter and he was just ignoring me, if he really were, I think that is very unprofessional of him to do so.

Our office manager contacted me and I told her about my letter. She said that boss is probably ignoring me and is not happy about my letter. The good thing about our office manager is that she is also a mother. She backed me up last time in trying to file for a 6-month leave instead of quitting. She knows how our boss thinks, for which I think is a skill she has mastered.

She plans on talking to my boss about me. However, she says that knowing our boss, he'll probably won't be willing to let go of me and will just ask for another specific date when I want to go back to work.

I feel flattered that my office thinks that I am important (haha, well, I do think I contribute a lot to the company), but I find it weird that they would just let me give them a hypothetical date of return instead of planning the year with the assumption that I am no longer part of the company (which I think will benwfit the company more!).

I am still waiting for updates from our office manager. I sure dread the day I have to meet with boss to talk about this. So wish me luck! I would really need it!

Motherhood: Breastmilk Supply

As mentioned on Article 5: breastfeeding is probably the most tedious responsibility that a mother can do.

SUPPLY AND DEMAND
It's pretty simple, so they say, the more your baby demands for milk, the more your body produces milk. For some women, they even have surplus milk. A friend of mine had too much milk stored in her fridge and she is still producing LOTS of it that she decided to donate some of her stored milk to the hospital.

Unfortunately, some women, like me, do not produce enough milk to suffice for my baby's demand. I already was munching, drinking, eating every known food that they say would increase the body's milk production (malunggay, mussels, fruits, veggies, any soupy food, etc.) but was still not producing enough.
When my baby needed 2 oz of milk, my body couldn't even produce an ounce from pumping. By the time my baby needed 4 oz, my body could only produce 2 oz.

I even consulted a breastfeeding expert and was told to try to pump every 2 hours. I did, but rarely would be able to do it religiously. Imagine pumping for 20 minutes, then you will only have around an hour and 40 minutes left to do whatever chore needed... Let alone find time to play with baby!

GUILT
Guilt started to creep into my subconscious eversince our doctor recommended to supplement with formula because I was not producing enough milk. I remember crying while driving home after my baby's 2 week check up (where the doctor told us baby was not gaining enough weight so he recommended that we start giving baby formula milk). The feeling that baby has not had enough milk for two weeks of his life felt like knives on my chest. The feeling that I am not able to provide for my child. It made me cry everytime I think about it. Until today, I still feel the guilt of not being able to be the 'perfect' mommy... milk-wise.

QUALITY OVER QUANTITY

As mentioned above, I felt so bad about 'conceiding' on my breastfeeding efforts that I had to google to see if there are other women who felt guilty about the same thing... and there were a LOT! I read some articles about it and a lot of it from mommy forums. One particular comment from a forum struck me: A happy mommy is more important for baby! She mentioned that she felt bad that her first baby had to experience a stressed mommy (busy with the obsession of trying to be the perfect breastfeeder) whilst on her second baby, she has already admitted to herself that her anatomy isn't just the breastfeeding type, so her second baby was able to experience a happier, more loving, more caring mommy. 

So I try to remind myself that my time is best spent with Quality Time with Baby, everything else is of lesser priority. 

Motherhood: Better Than Caffeine

Coffee is one of the things I missed the most while I was pregnant. Now that baby is here and that meant sleepless nights, I had the perfect and practical reason to indulge myself with caffeine everyday!

During the first couple of months, the longest sleep I could get was probably an hour and a half. Now that Baby is five months old, feeds every four to five hours, I try to sleep at least three hours at a time.

Most people will tell you "sleep while baby's asleep! That's the solution." Easy for you to say! But every mom will agree with me that that is not at all possible. There must be a mother-switch inside our brains that gets triggered by giving birth because as soon as I had a child, I have forgotten how to be idle.

When Baby sleeps and I have some time for myself, I don't sleep, I take advantage of that time to do stuff I can't do while he's awake. Like chores: laundry, cleaning up, etc. or stuff like BLOGGING! Even if I do try to relax, my mind starts to make a To Do List as soon as my head touches the bed.

I have been sleep deprived for a year now (starting from mid-pregnancy) and I amaze myself how I have coped with it.

All I am saying is, I could drink as much caffeine as I want and it might give me palpitations enough to keep me up; but in reality, caffeine doesn't really work for me and it is Baby's laughter, his smiles and his silly faces that keeps all parents up and running every day! :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sometimes I still have extra time to sleep but I end up just watching baby sleep instead. Looking at him recharges me already. 😍😍😍

Motherhood: Monologue

It is only me and Baby at home during the day.

I didn't realize it will be such a challenge to have too much quiet time on your hands. They say Baby will develop faster if you talk to them...which means I have to get used to doing monologues!

Yes, Baby will smile or laugh or make faces or make noise while you talk to him. But imagine spending at least 8 hours a day talking... And not having a conversation.

I catch myself smiling at the thought that I must look really silly but I have to remind myself that Baby probably understand what I was saying, he just couldn't talk back yet (yeah, just like the movie). Haha!

I try to do video chats with my relatives as much as I can, the main reason is so that they can see Baby more often. The second reason is to have someone to talk to. Haha!

Motherhood: Ninja Mom

You are a NINJA!

You are able to move from point A to point B without making any sound. Able to move baby from the couch to his crib, without him knowing. Having the extra sensitive hearing for baby's faintest sound, knowing that it is time to prepare his milk. You have extra three pairs of hands when you need to prepare milk, set the boppy pillow, get the burp cloth, throw dirty clothes into the hamper, etc... all while dancing baby to sleep. A 6-hour sleep seems too silly for you, 2 hours is enough to energize you and start up your 'ninja-ness.'

It is a skill that will be harnessed as your baby progresses. My baby is now 7 weeks old; I am now at the stage where in the middle of the night, feel the need to wake up automatically just because I sense his diaper needs changing, so I take my baby off his swaddle wrap, remove his diaper, put on a new one, feed him, burp him, then put him back in his swaddle wrap... all accomplished without disturbing his peaceful slumber.

Yes, you are a ninja mom, and you should be darn proud of it! :)

Motherhood: Epidural

"You can get the epidural anytime you want."
That was what my doctor told me.

My birthing/lamaze class, all other websites, forums, and articles I have read told me otherwise. They said you need to wait 'til you are 4 or 5 cm dilated before you can ask for the epidural. I was mentally prepared to wait 'til the right dilated size to get it but since my doctor told me I can get it AS SOON AS I want it, then, of course, I took it.

Especially since they will give me an inducing medicine Pitocin which will give me frequent and stronger contractions (to help progress the active labor quicker).

Another important information about epidurals: it is a very small tube/needle that is inserted in between your spine. I primarily thought an epidural is something they inject on your spine once, and then it's done. NOPE. It's a tube that will be attached (and properly secured by your Anesthesiologist) on your back the WHOLE TIME.

The process of putting it in, as for my experience, is PAINLESS. You are supposed to sit on the side of the bed, hunch your back as much as you can to show the spine, then stay very still. Relax. It will only take a couple of minutes to do it if your Anesthesiologist knows what he is doing. He will put a numbing ointment on the part where he will stick the needle. The nurse told me it was a big needle but I didn't look at all, I was just anticipating the 'little pinch' that the Anesthesiologist told me to expect... but I didn't feel a thing. In about 15 to 30 minutes, it made me feel numb from the stomach down to my toes. It felt so weird to see your lower half and not have control over it. I kept on poking my leg but it only felt like I was touching a very soft pillow. So weird!

During your labor, you yourself has the button that will control the amount of epidural you want in. If you feel pain, then click on the button and it will increase the dosage of the epidural.

To those who gave birth ALL NATURAL, with no pain medication whatsoever... YOU ARE THE SHIZNIT! I don't know how you do it, but I am extremely grateful for choosing to get an epidural.

Motherhood: Waterbag

Remember how in the movies, where a woman's waterbag breaks, you literally see water violently drip on the floor? Well, for a (very) few women that's how it happens. For most, the waterbag leaks slowly and for some cases, the doctors have to break the waterbag using a small apparatus.

What they didn't tell us though, well, at least nobody told me before... is that the water continues to drip/leak until the baby comes out. The whole time I thought that the waterbag breaks, and then that's it, water stops to leak and then you are off to labor. When my waterbag broke, I was gushing continuously, my Nurse asked me to change into my hospital gown, and then sit at the examination chair so she can put the monitors on me. I was so embarrassed having to change my clothes, walk around the room... all while dripping. I asked her "So, I should just drip right there?" I was talking about the examination chair. She said:

"Yes, you will continue to have that gush of water until the baby comes out."

So yes, expect to have the feeling of peeing without control for hours and hours. That is the amniotic fluid that is coming out, the fluid that kept your baby safe and fed your baby. That is why as soon as the waterbag breaks, the doctors will try to help you get the baby out as soon as possible. If not, there is a possibility that mommy acquire an infection (meaning, have a fever during active labor) and that baby may get that infection too.

My waterbag broke around 2:30 PM Saturday and baby came out 3:05 AM Sunday. My temperature went up to 104.3 F during active labor, which means my baby might have the possibility of getting the infection too. Baby's temperature was normal but as a precaution, we were admitted for 48 hours after delivery so they can give antibiotics to baby and see if there is an infection on him.

Luckily, everything was normal. We were able to go home after 48 hours.

Motherhood: My Baby Story

I always watch "A Baby Story" on TLC where they show how a mom and dad go through the labor and delivery of their baby.

This article is MY BABY STORY. :)

It would look like a long article but it would only be a mere summary of the whirlwind of emotions and events that happened that day.

I was 39 weeks and 5 days that day - 2 days before my due date. My parents who came from the Philippines for their first grandson has been with us for more than a month now. I know they are getting bored being stuck at home most of the time so I told them we will go to Macy's and do some shopping. We were all dressed up ready to go, I was the one who will drive and of course, given the bladder situation of a very pregnant lady, I told them "Okay, I will just pee and we'll go."

I went to the restroom and peed. As usual, I took a quick look on what is in the toilet (Since 32 weeks I have been extra vigilant on what I see 'down there' because of all the information I learned on what to expect, etc. etc.). I saw a very small amount of string of mucus-y looking discharge that they told me I should expect. I went out the restroom, and felt some gush of water. I was thinking "What? I need to pee again?" (Note that pregnant women's bladders are squished so much that you would need to pee almost every hour!). The gush was becoming stronger so at the back of my mind I was thinking 'is this it?!' I went downstairs, my parents and husband were waiting,

Me: "I think we would have to cancel our trip to Macy's."
My Mom: "Why?"
Me: "I think I am leaking."

It was around 2:30 PM, Saturday, April 14, 2012.

I called the hospital (US Naval Hospital Guam, Mother-Baby Unit), and told them what happened. They said to lie down for 30 minutes. After 30 minutes, get up and see if the gush of that clear liquid continues. I did... and it did! I called them again after 30 minutes and they said I should go to the hospital.

My husband was so relaxed on our way to the hospital (it was a 20 minute drive), he even remembered to put a towel on my seat, to absorb the 'leak.' I remember sitting in the car, we were just smiling at each other. I am sure we were both already thinking of a hundred things in our minds but on top of it all I was thinking of how weird and embarrassing it feels to be leaking right then and there.

We got to the hospital's driveway, my husband got me a wheelchair. I was in zero pain, but in 100% embarrassment, I got off the car and there goes my water... I was gushing so hard non-stop, my dress, my shoes, and the sidewalk was already wet. It was so embarrassing but all I could do was laugh about it and say "Eeeeewwwww." (See article regarding waterbag here) 

My husband had to park the car so I was left at the hospital reception area with some of the receptionists. They knew I was about to give birth so they were kind of bewildered that I was there smiling and laughing. I told them I was in no pain, I can walk (the delivery area is at the 3rd floor) and all but my water is dripping so I have to stay in my wheelchair and towel.

We got to the Mother-Baby Unit (where the labor, delivery and recovery happens) and it was Nurse Julie who greeted us. She was so nice. She said "I don't think we have a doubt here that you have already ruptured, no need to test you on that." Haha. She put on the baby heartbeat monitor on me and asked if I was in any pain; I said no. I am perfectly fine except for the leaking. She said "let's put on this contraction monitor. Some mommies area already contracting and they don't even know it." Then she did and the monitor showed 2-3 minute gap of contractions. She said "There's a contraction happening right now, can you feel that?" I said, laughingly, NO.

I was then officially admitted to the hospital. After rupturing two of my nerves, they finally got the IV needle in me. It was Nurse Susan, the super hyper happy nurse, that was able to find and put the IV needle in painlessly.

They said I was still 2-cm dilated (same as last week). Nurse Julie and Nurse Susan asked me what my birth plan is... I said "Epidural." And they said "Great choice!" Later on, since the day shift nurses went home already, I met my night shift nurse, Augustin. He will be my 'official' nurse during labor (we only get to have one nurse to help you during the labor-delivery phase).

I then met my doctor, Dr. Mercado. I think it was already around 8:00 PM that time. He said that they would need to give me Pitocin, a medicine to make my contractions faster and stronger, to help me get dilated faster since it was already hours ago since my water broke. He then asked if I want the epidural now, or the Pitocin first. I said I can have the Pitocin now since I had to wait for 4-cm before I can request for the epidural (all the information and birth class told me that). I would be forever grateful for the next sentence my doctor said "No, you don't need to wait for 4-cm for you to get the epidural. It is your choice, if you want it now, you can get it now. " Whew! So they gave me the Pitocin and before I can even feel it's effect, I was already given my epidural. (Related article regarding epidural, see this link) 

My mother, father and sister-in-law visited us in the hospital.  I remember just feeling very hungry but other than that, I was perfectly fine. They brought dinner for my husband which he ate outside the room so as not to torture me. We told our family to go home and get some sleep and they will meet the baby tomorrow for sure.

The baby! I try not to think about the actual active labor (the pushing phase) at that moment, I still was very much terrified of the idea that a baby will actually come out of my vagina! Dr. Mercado came later that night and checked on me, I was 5-cm dilated. In my mind "What?! All that medicine and all that hours, from 2-cm to 5-cm?!" I remember the doctor mentioned that he has a flight out at 4:00 AM and that the next doctor will be there to check on me in case I have not delivered by then. I was thinking I better get this baby out soon! I don't want to get transitioned to another doctor.

It was maybe past 1:00 AM when Dr. Mercado checked up on me again and said that I was 10-cm and 100% effaced. I remember his exact words:
Dr. Mercado: "You're 100% 100%, you are ready to push!"
Me: "I AM???"

I was prepped up for the pushing position (they put a reversed U-shaped bar on top of the bed, where I could put both feet on and grab on to so I can push harder). Nurse Augustin said "Okay, let's practice how to push." Long and deep inhale, the push and hold for 8 counts... for three times then relaaaaax. My husband, Nurse Augustin and Nurse Mollie (another Nurse who offered to help out Augustin) was there to coach me. My husband kept on reminding me of the Lamaze Breathing that we learned from class. Hee-hee-hoo-hee-hee-hoo and all that. I was so glad my husband was so calm and organized even at that time.

Few minutes into pushing and they noticed I am already out of breath so they gave me the oxygen mask. It did help as I am now able to hold my breath for the 8 counts as practiced.

After the first set of the 'practice' push, Nurse Augustin said "Baby has lot's of hair!" I was so surprised that he was already able to see the baby's head just from the first try. He said I was a 'good pusher' and that I am doing it right. I thought 'hmm, he sees the baby's head in one push, maybe I could get the baby out in five minutes!' That's what I thought!

More than an hour into pushing and still, no baby. I was EXTREMELY TIRED!!! I told them I was so thirsty. Dr.Mercado said to give me one sip of ice water (I remember Nurse Augustin looking not very approving of the ice water), I did take a sip and a few minutes later, while in the middle of pushing, I had the urge of vomiting! And I did... twice. Good thing Nurse Augustin mentioned it earlier and repeated it to me, that it is perfectly normal, that 20% of those in labor vomit. I also remember his disapproving look when I was given a sip of ice water, he knew it will just make me vomit. Haha.

Nurse Augustin and Nurse Mollie said I was doing good but maybe if I feel some pain from the contraction, I can push harder. So we all agreed to decrease the amount of epidural. So they did. I can now feel the pain of the actual contraction... it was really painful but at that moment I was so overwhelmed with the fatigue and my rumbling hungry stomach that I really didn't mind the pain at all.

More than two hours into pushing and all I could hear is everyone (husband, and the two nurses) telling me "THAT WAS A GOOD PUSH! WE'RE ALMOST THERE!" or that "BABY'S ALMOST OUT! YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB!" or "A FEW MORE PUSHES AND WE'RE DONE!" I was already getting pissed at all of them for saying those. I wanted to shout "WHAT THE HELL?! YOU'VE BEEN TELLING ME THOSE LIES FOR TWO HOURS ALREADY! JUST TELL ME WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING DOWN THERE!" but all I could faintly say after every set of push is either "Still nothing???" or "I am so tired."

It was probably 3:00 AM and I was already on my third or fourth position (with or w/o bar, inclined or not inclined, etc.), they were trying variations on pushing positions that will fit my anatomy the best. By this time I was completely lying down, with one leg held up by my husband and another leg held by me or Nurse Mollie (the most traditional position). I pushed and all of a sudden, Nurse Augustin stood up and went outside the room. Dr. Mercado was called in, then three other nurses came in, and to my surprise the room was already full of new people! Nurse Mollie asked me:

Nurse Mollie: "Do you want to touch your baby's head?"
Me: "Uhm, no."
I know that lots of mommies were so excited they wanted to touch the baby's head while it was crowning... but not me. I thought that would be too weird and why don't we just get the baby out faster? Like now!

They said "THIS IS IT!" Everyone was just shouting at me that time "OKAY GET ANGRY GET ANGRY! PUSH PUSH PUSH! OKAY, IN THREE... 1-2-3... PUSH PUSH PUSH PUSH PUSH" Holding my breath for 10 counts each time. After the third set, I was about to relax and Dr. Mercado said "ONE MORE ONE MORE ONE MORE PUSH! One two three four five six seven eight nine ten...YOUR BABY IS HERE!"

It was 3:05 AM, Sunday, April 15, 2012.

Doc put the baby on top of my belly for a few minutes while they start to clean me up. My immediate reaction was he looked exactly like his dad! Hahaha!

My husband gave me a kiss on my forehead and said "GOOD JOB!" I touched my baby's skin for the first time, it was wet and he looked so white and pale, covered with white mushy stuff. He looked so fragile that all I could do was slightly brush my fingers on his arm. What an amazing feeling! I was speechless! There are no words to describe how that moment feels.

My husband cut the umbilical cord, just as planned. The nurses took the baby to his bassinet, still in that same room, there were three of them who were in charge of the Baby's cleaning, weighing, measuring, and all that SOPs. My husband went to watch and take pictures of baby. I was there still lying on my bed trying to get a glimpse of Baby. All the nurses were busy cleaning up. I look down and I see Dr. Mercado busy doing 'something.' I can't see it fully because a blanket was covering my still wide-open legs, then I finally get a glimpse of what is on Doc's hand... he was stitching me up! I can feel the sewing happen but could not feel any pain since the epidural was still in effect.

When all the cleaning, checking, washing and congratulating were done, Doctor and Nurses left us with our Baby Boy. After all those hours of labor, the three of us were in the room, it was a peaceful, calm, quiet, PERFECT MOMENT.

Hello Baby Boy. We are in love with you and we know we will be for the rest of our lives.

It is truly the best blessing to experience God's greatest miracle happen before your eyes.

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I will continue to post parenting-related articles in my blog and hope it could be of help to other parents out there. Just look for the Category (on the right) "Motherhood."

Motherhood 101

This is the new chapter and I think the most important one in my life... I am now a Mommy.

What an exciting part of me and my husband's life!

Being a first time parent does entail A LOT of excitement, anxiety, and confusion. Day by day we get to learn something new, most of it things that make me say "I WISH SOMEBODY TOLD ME THAT!"

That's why I've decided to share random anecdotes of our life through this blog; stories of a (new) parent and hopefully be able to help those who are in the same situation as ours. 

Click on the Category "MOTHERHOOD" to see all of the articles on this.

:)

Motherhood: Breastfeeding

THE BEST OPTION
Yes, breastfeeding is and will always be best for babies. It contains the nutrients your baby needs and the best part of it all... IT IS FREE!
It is the best opportunity to bond with your baby. It is an overwhelming but good feeling when you breastfeed and realize that that cute little human being depends on you.

NATURAL INSTINCT?
Babies know breastfeeding as a normal reflex, however, contrary to popular belief, is not a mother's instinct.

As my nursing coach (yes, you need someone to teach you how to do it!), "It is the hardest thing you will ever do as a mom. They all lied to you, it is not easy!" It needs effort, a lot of patience, and is a very TEDIOUS task. You may read or watch videos about breastfeeding and tell you that it is such an easy and graceful thing to do, but in reality - is not.

COLOSTRUM
If you do choose to breastfeed, you'll start immediately after giving birth (like within an hour or so). They say your body will start to produce milk as soon as you give birth... NOT! You will start breastfeeding your newborn with a green fluid they call colostrum, for the first few days. Your nipple will have no choice but to get some bruises and chaps on the first few days as it is still adjusting to the fact that the baby latches on it. You would have to learn to teach your baby how to properly latch (the act of baby's mouth attaching to it) so as not to hurt you. During the first few weeks, you would need to do it every 2-3 hours.

BREASTMILK SUPPLY
When you and your baby get the hang of it, it becomes easier and becomes less of a task. It will also help if your breasts have enough supply to satisfy baby. I wrote a different article about breastmilk supply.

LACTATION
They have a term called "let down," it is when the milk actually comes out of your breast, when stimulated by your baby's latch. It will come to a point where you lactate at a mere sight or sound of a baby. Yes! No joke, you will have to use nursing pads to absorb the leaks. You would have to accept that you will smell like rotten milk for most of the day. Hihihi.

VITAMIN D
I also learned that the only nutrient that is not in breastmilk is Vitamin D. This is why your OB will most likely give a Vit D supplement for your baby. Our doctor said the need for the Vit D supplement for baby depends on your race too. As for Filipinos like me, it is really not needed, especially becaue we live in a tropical island where sunlight (a natural source of Vit D) is oh-so-abundant!